So, I grew up in house where I generally thought and was also made to understand that there is no way a man and his wife can stay at peace for too long, there must be misunderstandings, there had to be a moment where my father and mother would scream at each other, talking at the top of their voices where no one is hearing anyone, or even go as far as physical fighting and tearing each other apart.
And of course, dad always ends up leaving mom with bruises. Mom cries and and there would be neighbours and/or passersby who would either come to separate the fight or console mom.
As usual we’d just sit there and mope at the happening, and of course, we must have cried our eyes out as kids.
And what do we grow up to become? None violent people? I don’t think so.
Listen, and of course you must have heard this, that kids do more of what the parents do than what they’ve been instructed to do. Now a kid like one in the same side of the journey as mine grows up with these kinds of scenes stored at storehouse of his mind, then gets into beating his wife like the Dad used to do, you can’t entirely blame him, why? He has emulated same trace of his father.
Someone in my shoes has to fight these urge day after day, teaching myself the opposite of what I’ve consistently seen all my life.
Leaning how to talk in a low tone when I’m angry won’t be that easy, anger control in general will be a war between me and myself, but I have to learn how to keep all of these emotions bottled up if I want to lead a good life.
No one wants their child to suffer emotionally like this; constantly instructing yourself not to burst up in anger. But if fights between my parents had been prevented or hasn’t been a lot frequent, I bet you the case would have been easy.
These emotional expressions are contiguous with kids. Instead of screaming at the top of your voice, take your spouse somewhere isolated from the Kids and scream there. If you did it in front of them as a result of a sudden outburst, call them aside and apologise to the kids, telling them you knew what you did was bad, you just went out of control, and it won’t repeat itself.
Let me let you see what these things can realistically turn out to be:
A child who lived under violent parents would likely not control his anger in the presence of his boss in the office thereby talking back at his/her boss or behaving rude because of his/her bosses unfair decision.
A child under violent parents easily gets into fight in school and becomes a bully to other children in school.
A child under violent parents may likely find it hard to stay in a relationship without hurting their spouse physically.
And all these are results of violent parenting. In turn, these things affect the society at large.
You and I don’t want these things to continue, then we must make sure what happened with our parents don’t repeat itself with us. Do not hamper the destiny of your little boy/girl.
