I Never Thought Her Departure Could Leave A Big Void In My Life
There are some people whose impact in your life may never be felt until they have left. That exactly explains the story of Lydia, the woman whose love I took for granted. Lydia, your departure is causing me a lot of heartaches, and that is why I am pleading with you to come back home. The kids want you back; the neighbours also want you back. Everyone including our bedroom misses you so much.
There are only very few women left in this world with brain, charm and beauty; and this is not an exaggeration. I know exactly what I am talking about because I once married, lived, and spent quality moments with one of the very few.
Lydia and I got married close to seventeen years ago in Jos. God’s faithfulness towards our union was manifested in virtually every area of our lives. He gave us two sons and a daughter, and all our children are not doing badly in their various schools. However, I was not too buoyant; at least not up to the standard of my wife who is from a very comfortable family. Lydia came from a family where Christmas was always celebrated in the UK almost every other year.
Don’t get me wrong, I am also comfortable, but just that Lydia’s father is a very wealthy business man.
Lydia and I courted for only four months after which we thought there was no need to keep wasting time. We got married and like I said God, blessed our union with three lovely kids. The first few years of our marriage was paradise, we won several awards in the church as ‘wonderful’ couples. We went to places together, ate, together, and did wonderful things that a lot of couples no longer do few years after marriage.
As our family started expanding, our financial needs also started expanding. Our salaries could not sustain us that much because we probably didn’t plan for some of these things. Lydia in particular was not used to being stretched to the limit financially. Demands on the salary we thought was mega were obviously too heavy considering the fact that we had to pay our house help, pay the kids’ school fees, and pay the house rent amongst several others.
Maybe it was insecurity or whatever it was then; I started noticing some changes in my woman. She would nag and nag, and ask me to do something about what we were passing through. She asked me to get another job or take a loan from the bank so we could start a business of our own. She wanted something done so our financial situation could improve. However, I wanted us to do things differently from what she had in mind. I wanted us to cut down on our expenses. I suggested that the kids’ schools be changed. I suggested to her that we send away our house maid. I just wanted us to cut down on our expenses.
We couldn’t reach a compromise, and all we did was fight over these issues everyday. She went to her parents on so many occasions to complain; and this was contrary to what we both agreed to before we got married. Lydia and I had agreed that we would leave our families out of issues like the ones we were going through. So I was not happy when the mother sent for me one evening. She offered to talk to her husband so they could help us out. I just want to point it out that we were not in financial CRISIS; it was just a passing phase, but my wife was not prepared to see the cloud even for a moment.
During those periods we were no longer having sex, we were no longer eating together in the dining, and we were no longer doing those things we used to do together. So the intimacy was no longer as strong as it used to be; we were like strangers. My woman was becoming too overbearing, and I was not going to have any of that!
Crisis Point
One Sunday afternoon after we came back from church, we received an unusual guest in our home; my father in-law came to visit us. It was an unusual visit because he only comes to our house anytime we had an event like child naming or during my wife’s birthday party. After exchange of pleasantries and greetings, we went somewhere outside to talk privately.
He counselled my wife and I on how to live happily as couples, and advised us not to involve the kids in our problems. He made me an offer, which to be honest was highly tempting; but I asked him to give me time to think over it.
He asked me to come and work with him for sometime so I could learn a few things about business. He promised to pay almost double what I was earning as income in my present place of work.
After he left, I sat my wife down and asked her what she thought of his dad’s offer. I knew what her answer would be because she wanted the good life. Of course, she said it was a great idea, and that I should hand in my resignation letter the next day. I asked her to give me time to think seriously about the offer and the resignation thing; and that was when the second part of our crisis started.
She kept pressuring me instead of helping me to consider all angles to the matter. She threatened to pack her things out of the house if I didn’t tender a resignation letter before the end of that week; and that was when I got really mad at her. I didn’t know what came over me or what I was thinking when I uttered some words that changed her mood. I said she was good riddance to bad rubbish! I said her presence in my life was nothing but trouble. I used a lot of unprintable and despicable words; but I was shocked because my wife didn’t say anything in return.
She was speechless for an hour or more. She didn’t also deny the family some of the things she ought to do that day. Later in the evening, I called her and apologised to her for the things I said. She said she was okay, and that she had forgiven me; but something within me knew that she was up to something because she was unusually too cold for my liking.
The next day when I got back from work, I discovered that my wife had packed her things just when I was away at work, and the kids were in school. She didn’t leave behind any note. Not even her colleagues at work knew about her plans because I was told she didn’t come to work that day.
It’s been four weeks now since I last saw my Lydia. Her phone numbers are no longer active and her parents say they don’t know her whereabouts; but I find it hard to believe because they ask if they could have the kids so they can be well looked after. The kids are worried, and my neighbours are suspicious.
Please come back home Lydia! I know we can sort out things! As a matter of fact, I am ready to hand in my resignation letter and accept your dad’s offer.
