See Where My Desperation Has Landed Me
Dear Readers,
Any woman would give anything in the world to be blessed with a man like Larry; but the thing is, not everyone would love to be in this same situation I now find myself because of my desperation.
My name is Beatrice, and I have been married for eleven months with a man you could call the most charming husband this part of the world. To say eleven months was a long time not to have been blessed with a child yet is a massive overstatement because there are couples that have gone several years without one.
I knew how important a child is to every home; but that was not enough reason to have chosen to do such a terrible and despicable thing. I wanted to give my one and only Larry a child; but eleven months was a long time to wait. Larry encouraged me to be patient and that God would bless us with a child of our own in His own time. My husband’s family were not yet up in arms with me; but I was so desperate that I insisted that Larry and I went for a test.
Everyone excluding myself noticed how desperate I was, and that gave the devil the opportunity to exploit me. Then one day I decided to take my desperation to an entirely new height by asking a friend of mine to help me seek solution to my supposed problem. Uju agreed to help me since she too was unable to bear a child the first six years of her marriage.
Uju’s decision to help me was the beginning of the problem I now find myself in at the moment. Oh! I wished I had listened to my husband and our church pastor who advised me to continue to wait for God’s time.
Uju took me to a native doctor who promised that I would be able to get pregnant and give birth to a child in the next nine months. I saw this as a cheery news since all I desired was to bear Larry’s child in my womb. He gave me some concoctions and gave me specific instruction on how to use them; and warned me of dire consequences if things were done contrarily.
I did everything the native doctor asked me to without skipping a single step; but nothing changed. From then it was one native doctor’s or pastor’s place to another; but all to no avail. Then I took my desperation to the height that finally landed me where I have found myself at the moment; I arranged for a man to get me pregnant without knowing all the while that Larry was the reason behind my inability to bear a child.
I am so ashamed to say this; but I managed to get myself pregnant through a guy Uju introduced me to. I couldn’t hide my excitement when the doctor gave me the result of the pregnancy test confirming that I was 5 weeks pregnant. I went straight to Larry’s favourite joint, where he always met with other friends of his to deliver the news to him.
I was expecting Larry to throw his harms around me and give me a big hug since that was what we have always wanted; but what happened next really took me by surprise. He took me outside, and asked me who the father of the child was. I was shocked and scared at the same time; did anyone ever see me with the guy responsible for my pregnancy? Not even my attempt to pretend not to know what Larry was talking about could change anything as he quietly walked away.
It was obvious from Larry’s reaction that something was wrong somewhere; whatever it was, I was definitely not prepared for it. Dear readers, I got home that evening to discover through a couple of documents/papers deliberately left on the bed by Larry that he would never be able to get a woman pregnant.
These documents didn’t look like forged ones as they were signed by a reputable doctor from a reputable hospital here in Abuja. They were results from tests conducted after Larry was involved in an accident some years back before we met.
Larry was wrong not to have told me about it; but I was also wrong to have not only cheated on my husband, but lied to him that the baby I was carrying belonged to him.
Two weeks after and I am yet to set my eyes on Larry; and I don’t even know who to turn to. Is Larry’s mother already aware of this because it is unlike her not to come to our house at least once every week?
What should my next step be? Should I open up to my pastor or quietly pack my things and leave Larry’s house?
