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3 Mins read


It’s weird to me that out of nowhere I started to have a mental overload on this topic while I was taking a shower and I started to feel heavy pressure in between my eyebrows and the bridge of my nose. I was staring into mid air with hot water hitting me pondering why I distance myself from others who I feel tend to compete with me and the thought came out of nowhere.

Now there is a such thing as healthy competition, but not when it comes to family and friends.Don’t do it. Competing with a family member or friend puts a lot of focus on trying to one up that person. Now if I love that person and want their best interest, I want to see them win, why would I want to one up them? I have distanced myself and even cut ties with people who have made attempts to set themselves up to string me along in a competition that I didn’t ask to join. Again, competition can be healthy but only in professional settings. The weirdest part about all of this is that any single one of us can just be focusing on a goal or chasing a dream. We may share with someone close such as a parent, a lover, or a friend in hopes of gaining support and good advice. However, what we may not see brewing behind enemy lines is that these people may start seeing us as competition. It becomes a race to the finish line and we may never realize it until either they say something out of the way .

Sometimes you can tell in the advice they give or how they behave when you share a milestone or a step forward made towards that goal.When people tend to feel negatively towards your greatness they either do two things: stop fooling with you all together to avoid being irritated by it or they willing program themselves to go into a one sided competition leading them to start to feel bad things about you and act negatively towards you without there being a true reason behind it. I can’t keep a competitive person alongside me because their competitiveness usually comes from enviousness, jealousy, a sense of insecurity, a sense of entitlement, a sense of that person feeling like they are better than you, a sense of them wanting to see you do good but not better than them. Also there are those who may have everything they ever want blessing after blessing, but they are so focused on what you have and why you have it, or why it was given to you that way despite being blessed. That opens doors for hostility, negative attitudes,judgmental behaviors, and they began to focus too much on you (who they assume to be their competitor) obsessing over your every move, idea, talent, style, intellect to the point that they miss out on their own or even worse.

To compete with a loved one means there is something you see in yourself that you don’t like and or agree with. Even if you feel you have it all. The moment you feel like someone else isn’t deserving and you make it a point to compete you lose…automatically. As said above, “A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.”

My last few words to entertain this thought of the day…Just because I give you the list of ingredients or my recipe doesn’t mean you’ve done anything. It still isn’t whole until I put my touch on it, so with that being said your rendition of my work is just that your rendition. You can’t compete where you don’t compare. My goals are not your goals. My dreams are not your dreams. So competing with me would only cause you to make a fool of yourself because while your outcome is to one up me, my outcome is to be the best me. You will always lose and always be disappointed. Your only competition each day should be you and how to be a better you at all times. To imitate may be a race but authenticity is not.

Until next time…

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