Am I Being Pushed To The Wall By My Parent’s Desire For A Grandchild?

By
Iyanda Adisa
-
584
701

Poor old African ladies—my feelings go out to those young aspiring young ladies who are being pressured by their parents to bring home Mr. Right. It is race against time for every one of us because the society thinks you are a failure when all your mates are getting married and having kids while the only thing you could do is to keep telling your parents stories. Men (good ones) don’t come any easy these days, but my kind of parents don’t care if I conjure a man out of the blue—so long as I bring home a man.

My name is Morenikeji and the problem I have is that of being forced to get married. My dad has not given me an ultimatum, but the pressure of getting married is forcing me to do some stupid things. I am so desperate that I am almost like begging Ugo to propose or fix a wedding date. Ugo is the name of the guy I only started dating after my heart got broken by Raphael barely four months ago. We are only two months into our relationship and my parents are almost making it seem like the guy and I have been dating for a long time.

Ugo is from the Eastern part of Nigeria; and if not for my dad’s desperation to see me settle down as soon as possible, he wouldn’t have approved the marriage. My parents don’t like the Ibos (those from the East); but they seem pleased with our relationship because they are tired of being too picky.

In fairness to my parents, I am 31 years old, and most of my colleagues and childhood friends are married with kids. While age is not on my side as a woman, I don’t think marriage is a do or die thing.

It is rather too early to start pestering Ugo about marriage, despite showing some signs of seriousness. He looks and sounds serious and wants us to build a future together; but the two of us barely know each other.

I am just confused at the moment and feel like renting my own apartment in order to have time to myself. However, my parents are against such plan as they feel that it is only irresponsible ladies who live alone. This is absurd, but that’s what dad thinks…

What should I do now because the pressure is really sinking deep into my soul.

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