If I’m to be honest, many relationships I’ve seen throughout my life, I always wonder how they came to be. How they leave happily but sometimes, there is a lot of things that met the eye. Some make me truly believe in love while some re nothing to talk about. Sometimes, I am really scared to fall in love but I feel it is about taking chances and letting you leave.
Still don’t know how my love story will end but so far it been a crazy journey. It all started when I got a new job 7 years ago. Though I had been married for 10 years at that point. my marriage wasn’t perfect but I had no intention of cheating until I met my co-worker in my new job named Jen. We are both in our mid-thirties at this time. Jen was very beautiful and sexy. All the young and old guys in the company all want to be acquitted to her. There is this striking thing about her physique that made me attracted to her. But I was married and I just erase everything I had on my mind. My first week at woke was very crazy. I was just observing the staff and for a friendly person that I made friends easily. Between the guys and ladies. By the end of my one week at the office, one of my male co-workers was questioning about what I think about Jen,
She is beautiful right”?
I was perplexed at first then I told him she is very ok. He guy showed me the nude picture of her on his phone and explained they broke up like 2 months ago despite they are both in a long term relationship. He told me Jen has a fiancé and he has a girlfriend. I don’t seem to understand why he was telling all these but I was just shocked at the fact that they were both cheating on their partners. Who am I to judge anyway, I just kept our little secret to myself. By the end of the first month, another male employee seems to claim that he has also been with her recently just for trips. I didn’t believe all take the guy seriously because he seems to exaggerate about many things. But I just watched him talked.
Jen was friendly to me and I like her personality. I got a little close to her and we slowly became good friends. I noticed that guys don’t respect her. Anyone that approaches her just wants to just have their way with her that’s all. I know her to be a loving person that believes so much in the family but I still don’t seem to understand why she is involved with this entire dude when she has a fiancé. I never asked her if she was engaged or something. With the way I was bought up, my mum made me believed that I should mind my business and I can only talk when I am called upon so I let it be a doctrine in my life at that time. I could also tell that Jen has low self-esteem and she uses the attention she gets from men to validate herself worth. At one point one of our colleagues in the office started hitting on her because of the rumors he had heard about her. Since we shared the same company email and computer, I saw his request for a date, I jokingly asked her about it, she said she wasn’t interested that the guys are all the same. Another time I noticed she went on a date with the guy and how he was praising her that the sex went well. It wants my business though, it’s her life. I’m just a friend. Another occasion, I saw her and the M.D at some think of position I couldn’t explain or comprehend. She is always at his office and the way they talk seems that they were very familiar with each other. Again I saw it as it’s not my business. I never pressed further to interrogate her about her escapades it’s her business. But I just notice there are always stream of guys interested in her and she thrived for so much attention especially the way she dresses. All cleavages out and everywhere knowing fully that men are attracted by what they see. Sometimes am tempted to but I just retrain and remind myself that am a married man. It was a big task for me. I tied to talk to my boss if they can change us or switch with other partners; he said I should give him a concrete reason which I don’t even have. I just stayed put and principled
7 months on the job, my wife went for a family friend’s wedding for the weekend outside town. Jen called that she ant to come over and lets us work on the business pitch for the new week. I agreed since I was less busy. I later realized I welcomed the devil to come to scatter my home. We both got high and ended up having sex. Afterward, I felt extremely guilty and was confused about my feeling. I was feeling guilty because am married. My wife doesn’t deserve all these scraps and confused because I liked Jen but dot know if it was love or infatuation or lust
The next workday she ignored and pretended as if it never happened. it was really hard for me.I Couldn’t face my wife and her at all. When I finally had the strength to talk to her, Invited her to let us meet and talk but we ended up having sex again. This is how I started an affair with Jen which lasted for over a year until my wife found out. The marriage started to Detroit me more. My wife and I tried working things out but we ended up separating. I went back to Jen just to find solitudes. I wanted to love and my biggest fear in life was being alone which just happened to me .during this time, Jen was just using me to catch a cruise. Today she will seem to have feelings for me and then shut me out few weeks later. Sometimes she acted like she has nothing to do with me, but always jealous. If she sees me talk and plays with my female colleagues at work. I was so confused about my feeling and I didn’t even know what I wanted. Sometimes I call my wife, to see if we can make it work. The way she sounded most times always scattered my soul. I knew I was the cause of my predicament and I was ready to dance the tune to my own drums. Still, I was with Jen most times off and one. At times, we get into loud fights and argument over nothing; Using the toilet, this that blah blah. I wasn’t in any frame of mind for all these .so I scream at her. When we have sex these days it’s not always cool. We don’t even have any connection at all. The last time was very shocking to me. The sex was really aggressive and it included her hitting me and telling me she hated me while I was inside her. The truth is am not in a good frame of mind. I needed something to take my mind off my problem.
After the whole thing, I tried asking her about her fiance. she said the marriage was off. I just seem to wonder why she was so cold about herself and love affair until I saw a dairy that I took time to read when I was alone. It contains how he was raped by her stepfather when she was young and how men always ask for casual sex on her Facebook post. I think I realize why this woman was just always cold toward men. They snatched her good part with bad acts and I think I was doing the same too. So I had to apologize and try to be so loving to her. Make her realize men are not the same and she can still find love since my wife wasn’t ready to take me back. Jen wasn’t ready for all these she started a pattern of not talking to me and cutting me off but we always see at work.i tried carefully not to make anyone in the office realize we dating. After some moth, I was promoted as her boss but I couldn’t take the offer. my boss asked me why I couldn’t tell him why but I was given the position though. Couldn’t run from it. At first, Jen had a hard time with me to been her boss along the line we were cool. she had a family emergency that needs to be attended to. her dad was sick and the poor old man was in debt so she told me she needed me to loan her some money, I loan her 2million out of the company funds without following the proper procedure. when my big bosses discovered i was fired and that is how we lost contact. Jen didn’t even bother to call or check on me for like 2years. it was really devastating. I guess she had a problem of her own. I tried reconciling with my wife, after a lot of pleading and family interference, she finally accepted to make us work. which I promised her it won’t happen again
One day, I received a text message for a strange number pretending not to know who owns the number. but I recognize her voice immediately. we started talking and we both apologized for our behavior and we agreed to let it go. We still talk as a friend and decided to make everything casual since then. i just won my wife back and am not ready to lose her. but i know for sure Jen and I have a connection that I can’t get with anyone else, not even my wife.