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Is It Right For Mum To Stop Me From Marrying Him Because He Is Yoruba?

3 Mins read

My mum is a hypocrite, and I am saying that without regret! How can someone who fought tooth and nail to marry my dad who is a Yoruba man be secretly forbidding me from marrying the man of my dream because he is also Yoruba?

My mum is an Ibo woman who faced a lot of opposition from her family members before she was eventually allowed to marry my dad who is from the South-West. I used to envy her guts and ability to fight for what’s right; but how can one explain her deep hatred for Moyin?

Moyin and I met at my mum’s 50th birthday a couple of years back, and we have never stopped to look back since then. Mum never liked Moyin from the first time I introduced him to her; and her reason is based on him not being born an Ibo guy. I wasn’t expecting that from her because I thought she was not cut out for tribal stuffs; but of course, I was wrong. Now she is threatening to do everything within her power to bring an end to my relationship with the love of my life; how pathetic!

Mum is hypocritical about the whole thing that she keeps drawing my dad’s attention to the problem Moyin had a year ago instead of coming out clean on what the real problem is. Moyin was wrongly relieved of his appointment while working at the branch of a particular bank. The issue was investigated, and he was only dismissed because of negligence and not even because of fraud. To my dad, that is not a problem; but my mum keeps harping on other issues and nagging my dad all day all night about my Moyin not being good enough for me.

The problem with my dad is that he doesn’t want to believe that my mum doesn’t like Moyin because he is not an Ibo man. My dad seems to think such things are not possible with her because she once fought against that same problem some years back.

I know I am the only female child of the family, but it doesn’t give my mum the right to choose a man for me based on tribe or even religion. At my age, I have earned the right to choose the right person to settle down with, and no one can deny me that. She is just acting out a script written long time ago. When I was much younger, she used to drum and sing it into my ears that she wants me to marry a man from the east. Her excuse or reason was that it is almost impossible to find someone from the west who as similar attitude as my dad. My mum loves and adores my dad so much that she doesn’t believe any other man from the west can be as nice and caring as him.

What do I do, and how do I go about making my dad believe that my mum is playing the ethnic or tribal card? My dad knows that my mum doesn’t like Moyin; but he always believes that things will eventually smoothen out. However, things are not going to get any better because only last week my mum went to Moyin’s house to warn him off her daughter or he should be prepared to face the consequences.

Now Moyin is beginning to show signs of someone who is getting tired and frustrated with the entire situation. I am afraid that he might want to call it quit sooner or later as I am not the only girl in town.

Please help me because I know there are some people out there who have been in similar situation before. I just need help on how to get out of this quagmire before my mum’s selfish and hypocritical attitude drives the only man I love out of my life.





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