Workout-Mania, Team Beach Body!
Go! Go! Go!
The voice was loud and clear
My feet automatically obeyed and added more speed, they ran like their life depended on it, they ran so fast the blood was roaring past my ears, my chest pounded harder than a man trying to prove a point, my legs heavier than a due pregnant woman, and the sweat, I have never sweated so hard in my life.
I looked at Ada, she was running quite as fast and hard, she turned to look at me, her forehead was shining so much I could see my reflection, and then she grinned at me.
I grinned right back.
“what are you smiling about? Keep running! Go girl go!” The gym instructor yelled and came to increase the speed level on our treadmill,
“ahn ahn” I protested, “that’s too high na! You want to kill somebody!?” Ada nodded furiously in agreement, she was too tired to mouth her protest.
The gym instructor looked incredulously at us, “I just increased the speed from 4 to 6. That lady over there has been on speed 9 for the past 30mins, you guys have barely spent 15mins!”
He finished with an exclamation.
We looked at the lady in question, her body was sleeker and trimmer than that of a goddess. Whatever mhen, I thought to myself, some people can like to come and show themselves! Gosh! I hated comparisons, what’s my business if she is on speed 20, who knows what demons she Is trying to escape from. I looked at my own body in the mirror before me, ‘well, at least Ada has a pound or two on me’, I thought with a little bit of satisfaction.
“That’s enough” Jo -the gym instructor – said. He was built like a, like a…now wait a minute, I have nothing to compare him to, seriously as I write this I’m realizing l have nothing to compare Jo to, I’m gonna describe him instead,
“That’s enough” he said “oya come down let’s do some stretching”
We both came down, relief and pride plastered across our face. Do you know how long we’ve planned this? I and Ada have decided to start our workout one morning after watching Kate Henshaw take an aerobics class on a TV Show. Her body was just out of this world, and she was a mother. After watching the workout, I and Ada looked at ourselves –
..We met during service, became good friends and moved in together after service, that was 3 years ago. Now Ada works in her father’s company as an accountant or something, I can’t really explain, she tried explaining it to me once but I lost interest when she started droning about numbers and clients. I work as a media consultant, I would explain it to you if I thought you’d be interested but I’m guessing you want me to get back to the story. So anyways, where was I? Oh yea,
…I and Ada looked at ourselves, the chocolate bars we’ve just consumed leaving a sour taste in our mouth.
“We need to start doing some kind of workout”, I said and she nodded. That was Ada, she was so economical she wouldn’t even waste words, I was the talkative and that suited our friendship fine. That was the day we made our decision, that was 11 months ago and finally today we are taking action!
I was already counting calories I must have lost, Yeah I know Its been just 20 mins but believe me it’s the most workout I’ve had in the past 3 years so it must be worth something.
“Alright don’t over stretch, know your limit” Jo was saying. He bent over and my straying eyes went straight to his shapely butt. Oh dear! His thighs were raging with muscles and I could just imagine those shapely thighs straddling a bike, yea…a bike, take your mind off the gutter and take note, this is me describing Jo… And No, I did not forget I promised to describe Jo, I just didn’t want to dedicate a paragraph or two describing him, he might read this and feel too important.
So, we bent over like he did, and copy his pose, I jutted out my butt a little, you know…you don’t know who might be watching. He turned to face us and I envisioned his flat ripped stomach on mine (another description, take note) I shook my head to clear the thought…
“Now we are going to stretch our….” I didn’t understand half of the terms he used, who cares? Mine is just to copy and replicate in my best way.
I sighed, as we got into another position. But wait o, is this not supposed to be stretching? Why am I sweating harder than when I was running? I looked over to Ada, her face looked like she wanted to take a Shit,
“erm, instructor, can’t we take a break?” I asked,
He stood up from his impossible pose and raised his hands above his head – warrior style, “breathe in deeply” he said, ignoring my question.
“Arrogant goat!” my thoughts replied him, my straying eyes admiring his foolish proportional carved arms, while my hands emulated his, my lungs gulped in as much air as possible.
“Breathe out” he continued, and we silently obeyed. “alright, that’s it! Grab your water”
I and Ada face sagged with relief, it was finally over!
“Welldone Ada” Jo said and went to grab his water,
Ofcourse, I fumed quietly, why won’t he praise Ada, she was quiet and obedient all through, I was a challenge he couldn’t handle.
I and Ada were sprawled on our Yoga mat too tired to even drink our water,
“oh boy!” Ada said to me
“I know!” I replied “babe, let be going o, I dey H like mad”
We were already reaching for our clothes to go change in the ladies room when Jo came back,
“What are you guys doing? He barked
This guy thinks he is military sha, no manners at all..
“Erm, getting our clothes” Ada replied looking at him like “is that wrong?
“Your clothes! Ha! You guys are not done yet!”
Ehn? Ada and I went together
“But we just exercised and stretched!” Ada exclaimed
“No” Jo replied, he was definitely having fun, I could imagine him later that evening at the beer parlour, laughing uproariously with his friends over our pain, he smiled mockingly, showing off a perfect row of beautiful white teeth. Gosh! Does he work his teeth out too?
“You guys just warmed up and then stretched, it’s time for the main workout” he said
We both looked at his face for signs of joke, he wasn’t joking, we both looked at ourselves in agreement, Ada turned to pick her clothes as I turned back to Jo,
“You are fired!” I turned to pick my clothes…
“Hey, W.T…,you can’t fire me” he yelled at our receding shapely butt
“Then we quit! ” Ada yelled back at him. We giggled in amusement as we made our way to the parking lot. “can you imagine, warm-up indeed!” Ada said to me as I giggled some more.
***************************************2 hours later,
We were both watching Kaffy’s aerobic class on the flat screen, “should we?” Ada asked
“We probably should, this look a lot easier than Jo’s”
We both stood up.
4 mins later
Ada; “I read somewhere that if you imagine working out, it actually can burn off calories, depending on how hard you imagine it”
Me; “Yea! I think I read that somewhere too, maybe we should try that too”
We both nodded, removed our trainers and happily went to the refrigerator to pull out a plate of ice-cream to, you know, celebrate.