The main reason why we see things differently is because we don’t feel the need talk about issues like this. If you ask a typical Nigerian, Oga/Madame, How do you know if you’re addicted to porn,  mojo, blue film? , the answer you will get is “me! GOD FORBID” lie lie i fit no be addict.

If you say YES or NO, no wahala. But you need to know if  porn, mojo, blue film has become a regular part of your life and if you plan your day around it—you have a problem!

 

A porn addict may tell say, “forget, e no get who no dey watch am (porn, mojo, blue film)”.That’s not true, not everyone is addicted to porn. This addiction to porn will affect every area of the porn addict’s life, especially in his/her relationship with others.

 

An addict is filled with self-hatred, guilt, shame and fear. A porn addict isn’t a bad person, No far from it, but a person in pain. Often the addict has been sexually abused or suffers from other unhealed childhood wounds. Porn is used as an escape from stress, fear, loneliness, emptiness, and rejection.

 

His/her Relationships suffer because a porn addict spends more time with magazines, mobile phones or online rather than with his/her family or friends. Most times he/she experiences “being in a trance” (a state of forgetting oneself) where several hours spent with magazines or online seem like several minutes. Meanwhile those who love you and want to have time with you feel ignored, angry, unimportant and neglected.

 

There is no love, honor, dignity, intimacy or commitment involved in porn. Porn addicts also set themselves up for unrealistic expectations in their personal intimate relationships leading them to be unhappy and unhealthy.

The result of this behavior leaves a porn addict with feelings of regret, self-pity and humiliation. Without help he/she will feel depressed and experience lack of passion for life.

 

Pornography is all about fantasy, an escape from reality. Reality is life and relationships are hard work. It takes continuous effort to be in an intimate and nurturing relationship with a partner and family. When a porn addict commits to change and becomes 100% responsible for his life he/she learns to build relationships on commitment, caring and mutual trust.