Poor In Bed, Poor In Manners, & Too Unromantic-The Story Of My Husband
I simply don’t know why most men think showing affection to their women should stop as soon as they are married. That is what I am going through at the moment in my marriage. Abdul has changed, and doesn’t care about those little things that brought us together. He is so busy that we hardly see eye to eye sometimes before going to be. He comes in so late in the night that it becomes almost impossible to have sex as couples.
Sex may not be all there is to marriage, but to pretend it is not important is hypocrisy of the highest order. Each time I make effort to sit Abdul down so we can talk about our sex life, the only thing he says is that “marriage is not about sex.” How can I not complain about it when we only have sex once in a month? Even when we do have sex, it is so uninteresting that I begin to wonder if it is the same man that used to satisfy my sexual urge in those days.
I can’t even say categorically how we found ourselves in this situation because things were not like these from start. We used to make love at least 3 to 4 times every week, and it used to be fun. He used to buy me things, take me out, and treat me like a woman in the early stages of our marriage. Now all he does is talk to me irrationally, and apologises whenever he feels like. Abdul now drops his dirty socks and shorts anywhere he likes even without caring about the person that is responsible for putting things in order around the house.
I know it is the duty of the woman to take care of the domestic front; but I still don’t think there is anything bad if a man lends a helping hand once in a while. Abdul thinks it is my total responsibility to care and tend the baby. All he does is move out of the bedroom or complain bitterly that my baby and I are denying him his right to quality sleep whenever the baby is crying in the night. I am just fed up because he is violating our marital agreement, and refusing to give me my due respect as a woman. It is almost months since we had our baby, and my husband says there won’t be sex until further notice.
I can’t even remember the last time we had sex. When I was pregnant with our baby he hardly would come near me and stopped having sex with me then because he said I was already heavy; and I didn’t argue with him. It is now months after since he took that decision, and he still asking me to wait. Sex apart, other areas of my marital life are suffering all because Abdul thinks he needs to work hard to provide for the family. Would there still be marriage when he finally becomes a millionaire?
Please help me because there is no way I can reveal my identity or reveal my situation to any of my husband’s people. My husband thinks I am a nymphomaniac who loves sex too much. But so many months without sex is such a long time, and is driving me nuts.
I need help because I promised never to cheat on my husband but I need to feel loved again.