Dear readers,

I had wanted to share my experience with you a long time ago but, I think this may just be the right time for me to do so. My wedding is in two weeks time and I am in a confused mode hoping that with your help I may get over it.

I used to be in love with Dapo but, as fate will have it, things went the way I couldn’t control. To be honest with you, Dapo still remains the man I love most in my life.

Dapo is from a rich and God fearing home. He is not arrogant and annoying like other rich men’s son. Back then in school, he knew what he was doing and studied well. He used to be one of the best students in our department and my attention was drawn to him because of that.

Unlike every other girl, I walked up to him and told him how I felt about him. I told him that if he’ll accept me, I’d like to be his girlfriend. He frankly declined and I felt terrible. He told me that I wasn’t his type and that I shouldn’t be offended. It took me a lot of courage and rehearsal to walk up to him and since he declined, what am I supposed to do?

You might be thinking that I have no pride. I wouldn’t say you are wrong. I may not have pride but, I don’t settle for anything. I settle for the best. To me then, Dapo was the best. No other man appealed to me. I felt humiliated and horrible but, I summoned courage to attend classes knowing that he might have exposed me to his friends. But, to my uttermost dismay, I didn’t hear it from anyone, not even my female classmates who like to carry rumours about the school.

I didn’t give any other man a chance till my final year. It was because I didn’t meet with a man of my choice. The time came that finalists were to have a get- together and award winning party. I actually declined from going because I wasn’t used to going to parties. But I changed my mind because several people had been coming to meet me that I will be given the award for the most promising student.

Silently, I thought of the award as an avenue for me to feel important in front of Dapo who has totally dissed me as nothing some years ago. So, I changed my mind and got ready for the party. I put in place the best clothe I had. Although, it wasn’t party- like but, who cares? My status was going to be increased anyway so, I felt no puzzle.

The day came and I was announced as the most promising student. I went proudly to retrieve my award and my friends flocked the stage with cheers. I was happy. I was asked to dance and I did dance like an amateur not minding the crowd. By that time, my friends who danced with me were gone and I was asked to give a little speech to the audience. I gave a shy speech and as I was about to hand over the microphone, I saw the shock of my life.

Dapo was the one who collected the microphone from me. For a moment, I pondered over his intentions to have showed up so suddenly behind me. I innocently thought he had come to blackmail me before the people that have hyped me. And believe me, members of other faculties were present and the atmosphere was intense.

Within a second, I had thought of how terrible I’ll feel after the outburst from Dapo. I felt I had stayed too long after handing over the microphone so I managed to free one leg in anticipation to start moving. But, to my surprise, Dapo drew me back and made me to face him.

He shamelessly knelt down before me and proposed his love for me. According to him, he confessed he had not met with any lady as brave and decent as me. He pleaded with me to be his girlfriend and if I refused, he won’t stand up.

I could hear the crowd shouting that I should accept. Tears rolled down from my eyes and for another time, I threw away my pride and hugged him. That was my reply to his proposal and the crowd started jubilating.

Soon after, we graduated and Dapo travelled out of the country for his masters. He made me promise not to have any other man till he comes back and I did. He also promised not to let me down and I believed. But, when he left, things changed and he stopped calling me. I wanted to keep my promise so I wasn’t shaken. Although, I like to be pampered by a man but, I stood strong. You can’t always get what you want all the time.

Two years later, I managed to collect his number from his cousin that I used to know back in school. We bumped into each other one fateful day. I called Dapo on that number and told him I was the one. I accused him of not getting in touch with me and cried onto him. But, all he could tell me was to wait a little bit more that he was not ready. I banged the call on me and I immediately felt depressed. I decided then to give another man a try even if it costs not loving him. i wasn’t getting younger and I must act fast. So, I met Biodun.

No one ever showed me the kind of love that Biodun showed me in this world. I can only compare it with that of my parents. But, no matter how I tried to love him back, it just wouldn’t work. The time came for me to marry and so I settled for him since he was more than willing. We fixed a date in advance and both families had started to prepare in earnest.

Now, the wedding is in two weeks time and I suddenly got a call from an unknown number. Alas! It was Dapo. He told me he’s back for me and I was dumbfounded. I don’t know what to do.

Am I to cancel my wedding to Biodun who has loved me with his life? Or am I to marry him out of pity and let Dapo out of my life. If I do that, I may not have the opportunity to love again. What if I settle for Dapo? Can I be sure that he‘ll love me as much?

What should I do dear readers?