Have you ever come across the word “loneliness in relationship?” Maybe you have not; but it is a situation where you are not getting all the attention you deserve from your partner—who is by the way busy doing other things instead of giving you a deserved attention.
Loneliness doesn’t affect those who are not in a relationship alone—even married couples feel lonely sometimes too. Loneliness is also a big issue among friends as one could find himself suddenly left-behind in certain discussions or social gathering.
Although loneliness is greater among people living alone, it can be felt while in a relationship or group. This is because it’s the quality, not the quantity, of social interactions that determines whether we feel connected.
As the number of work hours and household television sets has increased, family dinners have also declined unfortunately. Individuals now spend more time on their digital devices than in face-to-face conversations—this has contributed to more loneliness among people.
Here are three tips on how to tackle loneliness in your relationship:
- Talk to your spouse about spending less time on the social media: The social media is one of the best things to happen to a lot of us as we now get access to more information and are now able to meet and make more friends. However, did you know that these friends we make online have started taking over our normal life and replacing our offline friends? It is an addiction that needs to be curbed in order to restore fun and happiness back to our love life. Couples have to cut their dependency on the social media and spend more time depending on each other for more lively conversations.
- Be more creative: One of the ways to get your partner’s attention is to help him deal with his addiction to other things like watching some of his favourite TV programmes. Some ladies are so addicted to watching their favourite cable TV programmes, thereby having less time for their spouse. Suggest other ways of spending time together—and consider taking your partner out on a dinner date if she is the type that would rather spend more time in front of the TV screen watching soap operas.
- Find out what interest your partner: Learn to discover what interest your partner. If your partner loves football; then you can bring up some interesting football topics just to engage him. People are more open to talking more with their partner when the subject is changed to what they love talking about.
- Demand a change: If the aforementioned fails to work, then you have got to demand for a change in attitude. Perhaps, your partner is too busy chatting on WhatsApp and BBM and not noticing how lonely you are—seat him up in the middle of the night and demand for a change.
- Don’t force a change: Even after demanding for a change, and he still continues to act the same way; then don’t force or try to force a change as this may backfire. Don’t act like Lola who ignorantly pushed her husband to a viewing centre one Sunday evening during an EPL match between Chelsea and Arsenal—she hid the remote control, and called a technician to tamper with her husband’s power generating set just to stop him. All she wanted was have a romantic evening with her husband on her birthday; but he went out instead only to return latter in the night. Guess what? Lola’s husband had since developed a habit of going to viewing centres every weekend to watch his favourite EPL matches despite having a cable TV in his house. This leaves Lola lonely and alone every weekend when there are key EPL matches.
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